This morning, Twitter (Thanks @lindsaysouza and @bonniekristian) sent me a distraction. I present the Manllow via ETSY.

There’s so much potential joke material here. The perfect man for a feminist, creepy Twilight memorabilia and a pillow that is eerily close to a 30 Rock episode featuring James Franco. (Hulu has taken it down, or I would have posted it.)

This is also the perfect gift to give that stalkerish friend of yours since you can customize your Manllow. This is along the lines of something Kate Hudson’s character would have made in How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days. According to the ETSY page:

HOW IT WORKS:

1. Send a high resolution picture of the “ideal” man’s face. Face should take up the most of the frame.

2. Make sure the face is the face you want on the pillow. There is only so much that photoshop can do.

3. Order manllow and send either link or direct file of image.

4. Face will be converted into stencil format placed onto the manllow.

5. Manllow comes to life! Now if you would like personalize with a name and/or a love letter please type in the letter in the message to seller while purchasing. Letter should be no longer than 6 sentences.

6. Manllow is shipped off.

7. Manllow gets loved.

Under no circumstance is this acceptable. Even if you are separated from your significant other for a long period of time, this is still…weird. If your Twilight obsession has reached the level of purchasing a backrest with arms and Robert Pattinson’s face, I strongly suggest counseling.